Have you ever gone on vacation and longed for some of the comforts of home? Your favourite snack? A neighbourhood restaurant?  The familiarity of a city? Now imagine if that ‘vacation’ was 5 years long?!

When we first left Canada 5 years ago I missed so many things!  Not just the obvious things like my family and friends, my job and my language.  But little things, like knowing exactly where to go in the city to find that certain something I needed.  I missed the convenience of so many aspects of life in North America.  I missed drive through EVERYTHING!  I could get a coffee, do my banking and buy lunch to-go without even getting out of my car.

I probably spent the better part of a year ‘missing’ home and all that came with it.  When I finally stopped importing the comforts of home, I began embracing my new culture and learning more about it.  I started finding local spots to get my new favourite things, because I was changing, which meant so were my favourites.

By year 2, I was quite comfortable in my new country, and by year 5 it most definitely had become home.  Of course by that time, it was time to go.

We had obtained a lot of things over the course of our 5 years in France…including 2 French-born daughters who had become stinky-cheese connoisseurs by their own right.

July arrived, and we thinned out our material possessions to that which could fit into a space just a bit larger than our old kitchen table.  Try doing that without raising any waves on the home front.  No easy task I tell ya!  The rest of our things were packed into 12 giant plastic bins that would join us on the airplane(s).  We said au revoir to the country we now called home, grabbed one last warm baguette, and headed to the airport.

In what seem like the blink of an eye, we had closed the chapter on the life we had created in this once foreign country.

We had prepared for many things 5 years ago when we left Canada, but what we didn’t anticipate was that we’d be raising 3rd culture kids.  Our kids live daily with the Canadian culture my husband and I naturally carry with us, even though they have only visited Canada and never lived there.  Home to them is all things French, because it’s the culture they were born into and lived in up until this point in their lives.  They will soon be living in Indonesia; their third culture.  I can only assume that like anything, it will become their norm after a certain amount of time.

In the meantime we had one month in Canada; visiting family and friends, filling up on our favourite foods, and getting everyone’s eyes and teeth checked.

After 5 years I can’t help but feel a bit of culture shock in my own country. Everything is so BIG!  Portions in the restaurant are double what I’ve gotten accustomed to in France and the size of the grocery stores are comparable to amusement parks.  I can stand in the aisle for what seems like ages while I choose from 39 different types of salad dressing.  It used to be France where I stood wide eyed in the grocery store, but now I do that at home.

To give you an idea of how long I’ve been gone; before I left you never heard anything about hipsters, mustaches, kale or anything being gluten free.  I had a lot of catching up to do!

I once again need to get used to everything being spread out and having to drive long ways to get places.  I’m not crazy about that, or the way that I can’t understand the way young people talk now—YOLO!!  But what I do love is hearing my mother tongue everywhere I go and being able to be funny again.  That’s much more difficult to do in a second language.  I get way to excited hearing Wilson Philips or the Barenaked Ladies coming at me through my car radio.  I haven’t heard those songs in years and still know every single word.

These are all little things I’ve missed over the years.

The first few days at home I had to stop myself from speaking French where ever I went.  At 5am in Tim Hortons while we’re trying to sort out the time change, without thinking I order in French, even though I was at home.  That only lasted a day or two, and when it was over, I was almost sad because I’d already lost a little piece of France.

After 4 weeks in Canada, we quickly fell into our old comforts and it felt like we lived there again.  Those 5 years in France somehow seem like an extended vacation, or merely a blip on our timeline.

We’re heading to Indonesia tomorrow and there are no doubt mixed feelings that naturally come with relocating yourself to the other side of the planet.  But, as my brother says, ‘It’s not my first rodeo!”  I’ve learned a few things along the way.

I now know that the friends that want to stay in my life will; no matter if they’re in spread across, Canada, France, Scotland or Australia.  The thought of starting over can be daunting, but it’s also exciting because I get to shop for more friends…and I love shopping!

I’ve learned that as much as I love my expat families, there’s nothing like the real deal!  It was great being able to spend such a big chunk of time at home and watch my kids become best buds with their cousins.  Reminder to self: Skype more!

And one for all expats to remember…one foot will always be planted in your last country, and that’s okay…just don’t plant it too firmly.  My first year in France I spent so much time thinking about Canada and wondering what everyone there was doing that I missed out on what was going on right in front of me.  As I move to Indonesia, it’s not Canada I’m trying to detach from, but instead; my most recent life in France.  As beautiful as she is, and as much as I’ll miss her, I’ve got to set her free for now so I can see the beauty of my new home without Indonesia being under her shadow.

So here we go, chins held high, ready to embrace the future; because this time little eyes are watching and small ears are listening.  The way we adapt will have a ripple effect on our kids, who are also settling into a new country and culture.

Here’s to focusing on the good, celebrating what’s right and embracing the new adventure!

Thanks for listening. I’m ready to go now!

~Lisa 🙂