It was nearly sunset and we were all sitting around lounge chairs at a rustic, beach-front surfer bar late Friday afternoon. Our driver had dropped us off, then he’d leave the car for my husband who would join us for a beer and pizza when he was done work. The kids were off to the side with their friends in the sandy playground that came outfitted with it’s own nanny to keep an eye on everyone. My white wine was sweating from the heat and I was having what, for me, was a perfectly normal conversation with my global girlfriends.

We were discussing the bravery (and sometimes drama) that comes with getting your hair done in Congo, or any foreign country, really.

Our conversation chimed around the table, “When I got my hair done in Russia…”, “In Indonesia there was no hot water.”, “In Japan they’d give me a massage.”, ‘In Brazil…” and on and on we went, sharing our crazy international experiences.

You’re going to miss this. I acknowledged to myself silently.

These were my people. I’ve known some of these ladies for such a short time, but somehow they understand me in a way only another foreigner in(insert country here) can. It’s the expat sisterhood and there’s something so special about it.

I’ve mentioned before that I’ve gone through ALL the emotions about moving home, and after working my way through all the steps of change, I’m genuinely feeling ready.

We’ve had a good run.

Still, there are things that will miss and will take some getting used to:

Repatriating Concerns:

Less travel

In France and in the International French Schools my kids have gone to, every six weeks there are 2 weeks of holidays. We have taken advantage of our geographical location, whether in Europe, Asia or Africa and travelled almost consistently every six weeks for a VERY long time. It was a luxury, no doubt. But that luxury has snuck into my ‘normal’ zone and I will miss that so much!

Of course we’ll travel. We’ve already got a few trips penciled in, but the frequency of our overseas travel will definitely NOT be every six weeks! Thankfully, as a teacher, the summers will be mine to jet-set with my globetrotting family. Since we were pretty isolated in West Africa, our travelling has already slowed down a bit which will help ease us in!

Juggling work

I’m preparing for a reality check and will soon find out how people balance working full time, eating healthy, staying active, maintaining friends and family relationships while raising a family and juggling kids’ activities and my own. From where I’m currently sitting it seems like a lot, but this is one of the things I actually felt like I was missing, so I’m about to dive in! Wish me luck!

Partying like I’m 20

My husband’s response when I tell him about this concern, “Ya…you’ll miss that!”

Living as an expat means there’s always new people coming and going. There are new friends, from new parts of the world; and people are always planning parties because sometimes, when you live on a compound, you have no choice but to make your own fun! I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t ended up either jumping, or being thrown into a pool in the wee hours of the morning once or twice(see recent Peter Pan post). Those kind of parties only seem to happen on expat in the tropics, or NYE, 1999. Yes, I will miss that.

Regret staying or regret going?

When we left all those years ago we didn’t want to regret not going, but it was a gamble. There was no way to know unless we did it. And we definitely don’t regret moving, looking back. There’s two sides to every decision. I didn’t really want to move France, because I was so comfortable in my life and it would have been easier to stay. Now, I’m so comfortable in my expat life it would be easier to stay. Yet, more and more, we’re feeling the pull home.

It’s time to take a leap.

Change is difficult. And these are BIG changes. It is a complete lifestyle alterations at the signing of a piece of paper. I’ve learned that you have to try and find the good where you are and make the most of it. There will be changes, and some parts of going home will be harder(like doing my own laundry again) but there will definitely be good in Canada, so we’ll focus on that.

Missing the International crew

If you kept an eye on the segment I did on my blog called My Expat Kitchen, you would have gotten a flavour of just how diverse our circle of friends here is. A few weeks ago we were at a community sale and I was watching from a far as my Canadian husband, stood with his Scottish friend, as they took the kids, who were speaking French to one another, to a lemonade stand run by the Venezuelan family and beside them was our Indian friend, on facetime with her husband in Ghana. Also at the lemonade stand were friends from Syria, France, Zimbabwe, Norway and Equador. This mix of people was perfectly normal and I love that. Of course Canada prides itself on diversity, and I’m a proud Canadian because of it, but I’ve yet to sit down at a dinner party at home that resembled a meeting of the UN. That, I will miss.

Things I’m Looking Forward to:

Being in the first world

This one is easy. There are so many modern amenities that didn’t even exist when we left that going home now, even to visit, feels a bit like time travel when coming from life in West Africa.

Speaking English

I’m so excited to speak English everywhere I go, but I also don’t want to loose my French.      See: two sides of every coin!

Not missing out (birthdays, weddings, funerals)

This was a big driving force behind us moving home. When we left, our nephews were in diapers. Now they’re nearly in puberty. The girls are so looking forward to celebrating birthdays and Christmas with their cousins and grandparents. We’re ready to make up for lost time on the gatherings we’ve had to forfeit over the years. I feel my waistline growing from perogies already!

old (and new) friends

Thanks to social media, I feel like I haven’t really lost touch with people back home even though I’ve been gone so long. I know who has gotten married and who has had babies and I am looking forward to catching up with old friends and making new ones…because after moving so many times, I’m kinda an expert in that department now.

Food

Give me ALL the produce and first world prices! One of the most difficult things about living in Africa for us, is the lack of ‘western food’ and price of groceries if you want to eat said western food while here in Africa. I’m looking forward to buying 6-8 boxes of almond milk for the price I currently pay for one.

Running

It’s been too hot, and I’ve been too blonde. For several years. I’ll just leave it at that.

Wearing my wedding rings

Lots of people still wear their wedding rings here, and technically I could if I wanted to. But I’ve chosen to tone it down, so all my bling has been left in the safe and I can’t wait to get it back on my fingers and ears.

Teaching my kids about MY culture

I can’t explain to you just how French my kids are. It’s the main culture they’ve been surrounded by since birth, even in Indonesia and Congo, we’ve lived on French compounds, with French neighbours, and they go to French school with their French friends. They talk to eachother in French when they play at home, as well as in their sleep when they’re dreaming. Of course they’ll keep their language and some of that culture will always be a part of them. But it’s also time to drown them in maple syrup and hockey, teach them to skate and ski, and say EH!

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When I look back at this list there is no greater evidence that, “It’s the little things”!

I can live without a lot of things, on either side. It’s just an adjustment. ‘Normal’ can shift once you learn to adapt, on either side.

So bring on the change and let’s do this Canada!

Summer 2016 @ Parliament in Ottawa